Commandments for parents

Commandments for parents

FIRST COMMANDMENT

Never engaged in education in a bad mood

The basis of efficient learning style in the family is a positive emotional attitude. Raising children - one of the finest human occupations, and it certainly must be accompanied by a good mood, calm, disposition to dialogue.

To confirm the fundamental importance of this simple advice, enough to answer a few questions. Where are you more comfortable - in the company of friends, lying to you, rejoicing communication, or a bunch of sullen subjects, where everyone is busy with his own business? Do you like, when you cry, or you prefer a normal tone of voice?

Any person immediately to give unambiguous answers to these questions in daily communication with children. Do we have no Apartments, which resembles the situation “conspiracy silent types”, organization of everyday life gives carelessness, and basic details showdown sound so loud, that clearly audible to neighbors. For those, who do not consider their family to such, this command is canceled as unnecessary.

The Second Commandment

Clearly define, what you want from a child, and explain it to him, as well as learn, what he thinks about.

Children do not repeat the lives of parents, they are destined to go their way. And they do not necessarily want the same, and that you. Therefore, it is better, all agree on some fundamental points.

The Third Commandment

Provide самостоятельность.воспитывайте, but do not monitor each step. Do not substitute education custody.

Adults do not like to, when interfering in their affairs, direct the actions of, impose ready-made solutions, delve into the details. Children - too. However, children - people are inexperienced. And though they'd like to just walk by, this they can do only by adults, to be tactful, timely and reasonable, it is a, instead of performing a given case “instead of”, “for” baby.

The Fourth Commandment

It is best to not prompt a turnkey solution, but it shows the way to it, and from time to time to deal with your child, his right and wrong way to the target.

It is very important emotional stimulation, immediate reaction to the achievement of each child. Here

FIFTH COMMANDMENT

Do not miss a moment, when achieved initial success.

Do not wait for a special occasion - Praise your child for each successful step. This will support him emotionally. The child feels, his achievements have not gone unnoticed. Prichem praise not voobshte - and specifically.

Not "you're done", and "you're done, because…"And be sure to let her feel the mood – in this case, their joy at his success.

If a child makes a wrong move, commits an error, it must…

SIXTH COMMANDMENT

Timely to make a comment, evaluate and act at once to pause - to realize heard.

Any remark should be done immediately after an error. In this note…

The Seventh Commandment

The main thing - to evaluate the action, not a person.

Sorry, it is at this point lies the most common and most serious mistake a parent. "You're flat-hoy" (personality assessment) sounds rather appropriate in this situation, "you did bad" (assessment act). Should specifically explain, what is the error, why the child did wrong. If you criticize the act, particular error, not a person, the child has no need to defend, and with it the unnecessary fears, fear of punishment, You coercion lies, etc.. Of strict, even hard, but calm strength and fair analysis of the act is born faith in the forces, in the fairness of the parent, its sequence.

To, to indicate the child to an error, do not need to remember all your life and all of history, which you seem to be appropriate at the time. The shorter the note - the better. After noting necessarily

EIGHTH COMMANDMENT

Touch the child, and thus give to feel, sympathy that his error, believe in him, despite gaffe.

Make it clear (but do not necessarily say), that at the end of an unpleasant conversation incident will be settled. The essence of man and his act - not one and the same. • Behave just hook. There is no patience mother and father.

Do not fall for the false idea, that the children are divided into talented and untalented, good and bad. Every child can achieve much, but for that he needs to see the final, goal. As football without goals and gate turns into a mindless running around with the ball, so life without a purpose - no more than a chain of chaotic impulses. According to Makarenko personality is derived from the harmonic connection of its prospects - close, medium and long. If you want to be a valid tool in the lives of their children, do not wait, until they SDE-bark error. Get involved in the construction of long-term goals - from long-distance to the center and from there to the momentary

NINTH COMMANDMENT

education should be phased.

If you introduce a high, Leaping, ambitious young man in the sector for the high jump, tell it on the bar mark the world record and say, "Jump!”, it will not achieve anything worthwhile. The bar should be increased gradually.

It is also gradually, moving from the first height to the next, storms of human growth plates child.

The task of an educator - timely and accurate manner to raise the bar, Guided by the system long-term goals

The Tenth Commandment

The provider must be strict, but good.

And this is the essence of modernity. After all, if the wrong action in respect of apparent rigidity and uncompromising - as he deserves, and to the person to make it clear, that treats him well - it gives results in education,

You do not have to suffer a false choice - what better method of education: "Authoritarian" or "liberal". No pointless cruelty, nor aimless kindness are not suitable as principles of education. All in good time, and you should be able to use different methods in accordance with the specific situation. Then education will be advanced, or "democratic". In any case, it will be held in accordance with the ideas of scientific pedagogy and psychology.

WHAT ARE YOU A PARENT?

We suggest you test the game. Ask family members to note those phrases, that you often use in communicating with children.

Now count the total number of points and find the answer. Of course, you know, this game is a hint of the true state of affairs, since then, What you're a parent, No one knows better than you.

7-8 points. You live with your child in perfect harmony. He truly loves and respects you. Your relationships contribute to the formation of his personality.

9-10 points. You are inconsistent in dealing with child. He respects you, though not always be honest with you. Its development is influenced by accidental circumstances.

11-12 points. You need to be more attentive to the child. You use her authority, but, agree, authority does not replace love. The development of your baby depends on the case to a greater extent, than from you

13-14 points. Feel, that you yourself are going down the wrong path. Between you and the child there is mistrust. It is not too late, try to give him a lot of attention, Listen to his words.

Well Bobkova. D. , social worker